Welcome back to my mindless monologue. I haven't been blogging much but so much has happened in the last 6 months or so that there has been no time. Well now it seems that I only have time. To recount some of the things that have taken place I'll start with the most recent...So my birthday was on August 4th (Happy Belated 23rd Birthday to me) and it just so happens that, that was the day I was let go from my position from wal-mart. Some birthday present right. It was very sombering especially with the hormonal rampage thats been going on. Oh yes, it doesn't end with the first or second trimester so well into my seventh month i'm still crazy. So I'm almost eight months pregnant, unemployed with no real job prospects. Ok, what happened before that. Oh yea, my baby daddy is crazy but this is something thats not new at least to me. There's still animosity between me and his family especially his mom. We don't speak, AT ALL. Which is ok but then me and Anthony (the father) still have hostility based on the fact that he has doubt of the paternity of this baby. Oh and its a GIRL, yay me. but it pisses me off to no end especially when we argue and its likely that he only does this because we argue. But I never thought I'd be in the middle of a paternity test. Really the shit is ridiculous. The baby was concieved on Feb. 15th-16th. a fact that I know because I had to work on Valentine's Day so we "celebrated" on my off day. I remember where we concieved but I won't tell. (the grandmother would be pissed). Either way whether he believes it or not, I can 100% guarantee that he's the father. And as soon as she's born I will be able to prove it. Its hard to have a different baby daddy when you've only been with the one person for over 7 months and now that is like 13 months. Ok, I'm done now. As you can see I'm still kinda pissed about it. But I still love him and I'm determined to try and include him in the baby's life if he so chooses. Really I'm just waiting to see how he plays it cuz just cuz I want something doesn't mean its good for me or what I need. So we'll see.
Like I said its a baby girl, and I'm so excited. Anthony isn't because he has 3 girls already but it seems he can only produce baby girls. Too bad for him. I'm happy although I was really hoping for a baby boy and thats only because as an older sister I've always wanted an older brother. I've got a younger brother whom I love dearly, (Hey Ron) but there's something very protective and endearing about an older brother and a little sister and basically that's how I wanted to model my children. But the good Lord decided thats not how its going to go. Or maybe it will. They could be wrong down at Lifestages. Its happened to other people I know. I guess I'll just have to wait to meet her and see for myself. Well seeing how there's not a lot I can remember about what's happened before I found out the gender I'll end it here for today. But I plan to be back soon. There's still the baby shower and I still have about 8-9 weeks. So adios. Hasta luego.
